Category Archives: Light Relief

Light Relief

Simple as A, B, what now?

My youngest daughter, Miss E, is 4 and a half. That’s only 6 months away from school. And though she’s fantastic with her numbers and counting, I recently realised she doesn’t know the alphabet. Like can’t-even-sing-the-song-by-rote. Sometimes she manages to sing A B C D E F G W X Y and Z.

Uh, baby, there’s a whole chunk of letters in the middle that are going to be pretty useful one day.

I don’t remember actively teaching my oldest the alphabet, but maybe I was a bit more onto it (or less exhausted) back then.

Anyway, since learning the alphabet is the first step to reading, I thought I’d get my parenting arse into gear. So I bought a set of cheap alphabet blocks from the supermarket. Now, they were cheap, and I wasn’t expecting much, but still…

Here are a few ways these blocks are flawed. (Click images for larger versions.)

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1. The letters are coloured in a pattern of red-green-yellow-blue…until you get to N, and then it red-blue-yellow-green. Uh…okay? But, to prove Miss E is mathematically minded, she complained about the problem.

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2. Each block has one number on it. We get from 1 to 9 (and then 0) fine. But 4,2,8? Then we start to repeat (because the A block and the N block are the same, so I guess that’s cool. (And ignore the O on the end. It’s actually a letter O, not a zero. There’s an 8 underneath – it tricked me.*) But, seriously, who chose 4,2,8? Not even 2,4,8!

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3. Each block also has two images on it, which I guess are meant to coincide with the two letters on the block. So, the A/N block has an apple, and a…train. Yep, a train. You can see it in the middle there. I swear I didn’t rearrange the blocks. All I did was rotate them and try to pick the best image.

A = apple
B = bee
C = cat (weird-looking, but still: legs, tail, whiskers – I can buy it’s a cat)
D = duck (kind of looks duckish)
E = cherries?
F = freighter? frigate?
G = glasses
H = horse
I = insect
J = chicken?
K = candlesticks?
L = jar?
M = ??? (seriously, no idea what that could be. I don’t even know if I’ve got it up the right way.)
N = train?
O = orange (yes! Go O!)
P = helicopter?
Q = ??? (again, seriously? Who knows?)
R = cablecar? gondola? (sorry, that one’s upside down*)
S = seal
T = stars (twinkle, twinkle…)
U = tulip?
V = (tele)vision
W = dove?
X = strange little house with a chimney?
Y = yacht
Z = that’s a flower of some description (zinnia?)

I guess that will teach me for buying the first cheap and nasty set of blocks from a supermarket.

But we’ve still been having fun trying to name each letter, and figuring out where it goes. And she’s definitely improving, so it’s money well spent. 🙂

* and I was too much of a slacker to redo the photos

Confession Time Light Relief

Photography Hilarity

What happens when you take a woman who has no idea how to pose and combine her with a snap-happy photographer?

You get a bunch of hilarious candid shots mixed in with some gorgeous ones.

Where am I going with this?  Well, I needed a fantastic photo for the website and I didn’t have any that were suitable.  I was looking at cropping my hubby out of one, or my baby daughter out of another.  (My daughter isn’t a baby any more, so you can guess how old that photo is.)  So I turned up on my sister’s doorstep with a bag full of “costume changes” and begged her to take some photos of me.

There may have been alcohol involved.

I did get a wonderful shot (check out the About page if you haven’t seen it) and we laughed our arses off at the hideous ones. Really, there’s nothing like sitting around with your sister and scrutinizing all your flaws… It really was fun.  I promise.

And then there was this photo:

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I look like I should staring in an advertising campaign for Women’s Refuge or Red Cross.

Poor Amy, she looks so sad! Make a donation to one of those great causes and she might smile again.

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All credit to my fabulous sister for the photos.

Light Relief

We’re gonna need a montage

Have to credit my hubby with this Friday funny.

I’m sitting in the lounge listening to 80s classics and he tells me it’s perfect music for a montage.

So here’s a montage of me writing.

***

Typing on the computer…

Pulsing 80s beat starts…

More typing…

Wipes sweat from brow…

Chews on a pencil…

More typing…

Switches to a typewriter (we’re doing this old school)…

Pulls the page from the typewriter and throws it over my head…

Stop-motion shot of a rubbish bin filling with screwed up paper…

Nods thoughtfully and types furiously…

Stands beside printer as hundreds of pages fly out (screw that old school stuff)…

Stacks pages and makes sure they’re even…

Music starts to fade out…

Walks off into sunset, leaving manuscript on table…

Fist pump…

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Photo credit: gilles chiroleu via photopin cc